Insurance Not Assurance

When one has a chronic condition, one must become an expert in health insurance matters or risk being taken advantage of. Frankly, I don't know which is more stressful at this point: the disease or the medical bills it creates.

Dealing with insurance companies is as much about dealing with people as it is about understanding the twisted system of diagnosis codes and preexisting conditions. Whenever money becomes the highest concern either of myself or an organization, everyone's priorities are thrown our of whack. So, I say the same prayer every time I dial that dreaded customer service number.

Give me strength to face this day,

Keep me in the rightful way,

Guide my tongue in all I say,

Help those I need, my LORD, to care,

Remind us both that You are there. AMEN.

Sometimes, I'm blessed to find a customer service rep who truly seems to understand just how badly I need their help. (Thank you, Mari, wherever you are). But sometimes, I don't, and I have to remind myself that Jesus died for jerks, too. And sometimes that jerk He died for is me.

When it doesn't go so well, when my lack of control has turned into outright helplessness and the unfairness of the world is threatens to overwhelm me, I pray this:

Loving Father, wash away

All that has been wrong this day.

Give me rest and let me be

Strengthened and refreshed, dear LORD, through Thee. AMEN.

God has all sorts of ways of showing us that the only thing that matters, His love, is the only thing that is totally secure, through the sacrifice of His Son. It's a painful process to endure sleepless nights in order to prove there is no real need to stay awake.